Autism and the School Toilet

IEP
My son is starting to test for his IEP. The one he has is 1 1/2  yrs expired.
I took him out of public school and was very successful in homeschooling.
But he's older now and more able to communicate what his needs are ~~
or so I thought. The one aide, yesterday, while the teacher was in a meeting
with other parents and myself~~~told my son to "hold it" when he needed
to use the boys room. Seriously, this is my angry button. Well, okay, I do
have more than one of those when it comes to my child. My son, nor yours
should EVER be told to "hold it". So my child with Autism, used is underwear
instead of a toilet!  The Principal is a JEWEL and told me, "when there's a
problem, I want an email from you". Yep, and today she told the teacher and
the class aides, "Don't ever tell a student to hold it, if they have to go to the
toilet, take them".  Point Principal! So the testing will be taking place now,
sooner than the staff might have wanted.The District Representative for
Special Education told them to step up the process of testing the Autism
Cluster students and has sent them help to get that goal completed! Point
District Rep.

My son is more advanced in 3 subject than his age~~~and behind in 3
subjects for his age. I do honestly believe that with more prompting he will
excel in all subjects. He just has no interest in those areas.

No Milk
I just found out from another room Mom, Braxton wasn't drinking anything
at lunch when he took home lunch (which is RARE thank heaven). He did
say, "I need milk", but was told by the teacher or aide "go get it".  Well, he
does have Autism. He just walked over and walked back. SO, now the
other room Mom, walked him over to get the milk. It's not an easy process.
You must have your "card" to get the milk. The teacher holds these cards, not
the student. I have seen teachers put the cards on lanyards, that might be the
trick for us too. I need to see if there's a business or bank that will donate
these string lanyards. OR maybe go and get them myself.  It's difficult for the
students to hold their trays and the cards. AGAIN, another sensitive issue
the teacher should have already thought of instead of a room Mom.

Onward and upward!

Autism And Partly Cloudy

16 September 2013

Yep, It's Monday.  Little guy didn't want to get up. I had to remind him
that his "frin" Mary would probably be there! It was a 45 minute process
to get him out of bed.

Since he has a script for his Cetaphil hand soap, I had to refill the classroom
bottle and then get a bottle for the nurse station boys room. HE won't be
bullied in a private boys room. I so wouldn't want to be a parent raising a
child that is a bully to ANYONE but especially to a child with a disability!
I just photocopied the script label. I'm not going to buy the expensive brand
from the pharmacy every time just to get the script label too. NOW, that's
all done! I did manage to make a mess during the refill, HELLO, next time
I use my glasses and go out of the classroom.

THEN it was off to the school cafeteria. Gus has changed his mind about
what days he wants home lunch. He wants to try the beans-nachos-cheese
and a few other school items. I'm all for him having a hot lunch! With his
egg as the main entree allergy, it's a challenge. I don't allow him to have
breaded items @ the cafeteria. It's still difficult for him to understand why
of this but he will get older and understand more each day.

We had rain this morning and that made it wonderful, nice and cool.

Gonna' be a great day. This is more of a prayer than anything!

Autism and Birds

Sun Conures @ Tracy Aviary   @COPYRIGHT PHOTO DO NOT COPY. DO NOT STEAL. 

Been raining here for 4 days. No floods. WE are feeling blessed....love the rain. Tomorrow is ANDY day Tracy Aviary for Braxton. He misses his "frin". School was GREAT today. He wasn't allowed to eat lunch in cafeteria, they served eggs. SO, he had lunch in classroom w/ Mary, Alex, Austin & Mrs. Nikki. Mary is in older Autism Cluster and the boys are in his classroom. Braxton had a huge lunch. I was amazed he ate it all. I made applesauce and zucchini bread for his lunch (yes, from scratch). He also had a sandwich, pringles (yuck to me), butterscotch pudding, and a kiss. Makes me full just thinking about it. I kept saying, "is this enough", "No Mom, I be hungry". Cutie patootie... HE was smiling when he left school. THANK YOU GOD FOR THIS BLESSING. love to all, be safe and have a great weekend.

Autism Journey Journal 14 September 2013

PHOTO COPYRIGHT @ autism for life blogger. 

do not copy my photos. 

I wasn't able to attend the Open House for this class. 

My son doesn't do well in new  surroundings and this

was utter kaos/chaos according to everyone that went. 

I met one Mom that showed up at school and through

her I was able to find a site that was for Mom's with

Autism children in Utah. On the site I stumbled onto

another Mom. Just from reading her post, I knew she

had a son in the same school and classroom. From

there another Mom and I hooked up through the first

Mom. WE are amazing aren't we, Mom's. So I have

now had contact with 3 Moms from son Gus (not his

real name) Autism Cluster Classroom and eight to go!

Rachel has a son in 1st grade and Melissa has a son in

3rd grade and Loraine also has a son in third grade.

No Bus

I live down the street from the school and that's a
good thing since my son can't ride the bus due to
his severe allergies to eggs as the main ingredient
(traces in cooked food, mostly don't bother him
now and all nuts. Most children do NOT wash their
hands and face after they eat and then would touch
everything on the bus. NO way to protect my son
from cross-contamination. 

So I take and pick my son us daily from school.

What I go through only another Mom (or Dad) that
has a child with such severe allergies can understand.
Imagine not being able to have eggs or any nuts in
your home or life! We have lived this since he was 3
months old.

As I mentioned before, we had become so frustrated
with schools that don't provide for Autism students.
We have moved two other times seeking a better
place for our son.

We are very hopeful this is the district that will work
for us. Sadly, it's smack dab in the middle of the city.
NOT being a city person this has been very stressful
on me but onward and upward Mom!

His Stuff

My little boy, Gus is 9 years old and in 3rd grade. He
exceeds in science and reading. The other subjects
he struggles w/.

His Past

This is our third Autism Cluster Classroom. The others
had 3 aides and a certified teacher. In one class my
son had a 1 to 1 aid due to all his medical issues.
Thankfully, he's older now and doesn't get as ill.
THIS is me now knocking on wood!!!

Gus hasn't been in the hospital for 1 1/2 years. The one
Autism Cluster Class didn't teach anything to the verbal
students. It was all based on non-verbal education @
Preschool level. My son was 5 years old at that time. The
other taught @ Preschool level as well and my son was
7 then. That Autism Cluster Classroom staff (teacher and
3 aides) managed to lose 2 students in 2 months during
playground time. My son does wonder if not watched it
was very terrifying for all the parents of this Autism Cluster.
Then my son was bullied by a fellow Autism classmate.
That student felt he owned the class computer and every
time my son sat at the computer, my son got punched
~~not just once but several times. The teacher and aides
ignored the behavior or swore they were out of the room.
Sadly for those staff members, they weren't trained enough
to know that children with Autism do NOT have the ability
to lie! 

So far in this school I have noted that the teacher, aide
nor Principal will allow physical violent behavior.That's
a huge plus. I will do just about anything for my son's
medical needs and education. I am a Mommy Bear......
do not mess with my cub!

Not School

My husband and I have an uphill battle daily getting
our son to class. He does have those bad memories
installed in his brain. And for those of you that have
a child with Autism or work with children of Autism,
know what I mean. It's not easy to removed negative
experiences and replace them until a new routine of
trust and positive experiences replace the old.

Bully

My son was bullied in the boys room the other day
by a"normal" 4th grader. The teacher was in the hallway.
This district, like most doesn't allow teachers, aides,
parents in the children's loo. But, being blessed as we
are a "normal" male student came out of the loo and
told the teacher what happened. My son was in tears
and of course emotionally drained.  So after me nearly
blowing a fuse, it's now worked out that my son will
use the boys/girls room in the Nurse station.

A Target

From what I am being told, my son is the only Autism
student that has been bullied/harassed so far this year
(school started two weeks ago. My son is easily noticed
due to his headset for his above superior hearing. If he
doesn't wear that headset he gets headaches and has a
meltdown from noise. Noise that "normal" people take
for granted. Gus can hear me whisper while wearing
his headset.

Parents As Classroom Cluster Helpers

Classroom Mom Melissa has an idea of Cluster Classroom
Parents. In another school her son attended, parents
helped in classroom clusters. I like this idea, but in my
opinion is this district is CHEAP and they should be
providing another aide during cluster times.

There is NO WAY a teacher and one aide will be able to
work with twelve students all on different levels ~~ and
HELLO they all have Autism! This district is saving money
in the WRONG place! Clusters haven't started just yet.
The teacher and aide are still trying to work on the
policies/rules of classroom and school. Remember,
these students have Autism and most of the class
appears to be first graders.

Student Buddies

Melissa son's former school also used "buddies" for each
Autism student from the "typical" student body. My son had
two "typical" female students eat lunch with him daily in his
classroom at the former school. Back then he wasn't able to
be around food that had egg or nuts cooked in ANY food.
(We've come along way!) I know this program can work,
if the "typical" students are educated about the special
needs students. I also agree with Melissa, this program
would cut down or stop the bullying or harassment that
my son experienced. I am pro the buddy system! 

Don't touch me.

Gus has issues with being touched. If he wants a hug be

ready! He hugs so tight you lose your breath. BUT do not

touch him without permission. So this is a problem at 

school as well. His desk is over 2 feet away from any other

desk. He must have his bubble space!

The 3 A's

Do you have those, or does someone you know have those?

Autism~Asthma~Allergies. My son has over 200 environmental

and food allergies. Try living like that! I would like to find

a group of Mom's just for this problem. Still looking. Wait, 

maybe I should start one!

NOT the PTA

I am anti-PTA. Each school pays most of the money they earn

for national dues/fees. NOT good. In Arizona, I was a secretary, 

treasurer and later Vice President to PTSO (Parent-Teacher-Student

Organization). Why any school or district in the RIGHT mind is

willing to pay dues/fees to a national office in 2013 is just

beyond me! The Principal mentioned to me that the PTA parent

meeting for Room Mom's, Party Planning etc will be next week.

I did mention my thoughts on the PTA organization!!! I won't be

joining them as a member but I WILL be  helping with my son's

classroom and parties. The other Autism Cluster Classrooms

my son attended didn't participate with PTA. They had no

interest in anything but MONEY. We the parents paid for all

our Cluster activities etc. Worked out VERY well for all involved,

well, expect the PTA!

OH NO, NOT HALLOWEEN

Just another event to cause trauma in my son's life. We gave

up this item when he was 3 years old. The horror that the

youth and young adults use with Halloween, has made it an

evil time and our family won't participate in evil. Gladly, the

Principal mentioned to me that this school has a costume

parade and they walk through the whole school including

all the classrooms. Why schools still participate in holiday

parties is beyond me as well. Holidays are a PERSONAL

preference and not an educational item. There are religions

that don't celebrate the same holidays and since many

holidays are of a religious background (like Halloween) they

have NO place in our public schools. Yes, I am a christian but

I do not feel I should be forcing my Christmas holiday on

a non-Christian or someone that feels holiday's are not

appropriate. 

So, I have requested the costume parade NOT go into the

Autism Cluster Classroom. My son is terrified of most

costumes and he's NOT going to stay home just so another

child can enjoy Halloween at a public school. The costume

parade last about 45 minutes. Before and after the parade

all mask must be put away for good. The Principal doesn't

allow teachers, staff and the TONS of parents that come for

the parade to wear a mask. HELLO, parents in the parade.

Ya', that's what I thought. It's the weird parents pushing

this parade. This is the first school my son has attended 

that has allowed Halloween costumes. I just hate this time

of year. We must keep our son away from the stores that

display the horrid costumes. The nightmares, sleep walking

and terror his brain experiences, is just NOT worth the

trauma. 

Fall Festival - Harvest Festival Anyone?

The other schools my son attended changed the name and

like I said didn't allow costumes. They played games and

won small prizes. This activity was used as a "social" activity

to help teach social behavior. No bobbing for apples~~or germ

fest as the nurse call that activity! Bean bag toss was an

all time favorite of the Autism students. We also played pin

the stem on the pumpkin. 

Sleep walking and wondering you say?

We have a great alarm system installed to prevent our son

from leaving without us knowing. It's called "Bailey". A

service dog for our son. Occasionally Bailey does sleep on

the job so Dad and Mom are ever alert.

A Thought In Passing

We many not have the same child but Autism keeps us

held together like glue. We are all in this Autism thingy

together!

FUN ACTIVITIES WE LIKE TO MAKE OTHERS AWARE OF:

Tracy Aviary. Saturday @ 1:30 p.m. ANDY the CONDOR walks with children through the park.

United Angels Foundation. org. Activity JUNE Lehi, Utah.

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND

Boys Room and Bullying.

Having that time. My son had a horrible day at school. He's used to having a toilet room in the classroom.
NOW at this school, he has to wait for an aide to take him down the hall. He does sometimes wonder
off, if left on his own. SO, while using the boys room 4th grade students are bullying him and I JUST found
out about this yesterday when I got him from school. The school was just trying to ignore it BUT MOMMY
is on her BROOM today and they all got an ear full today. THIS is serious. Bullying is NOT tolerated AT ALL by this Mommy. AND I had better hear tomorrow from this school that the students involved have been disciplined! OR all hell is going to break loose in their faces. WHAT me angry. YOU bet I'm angry.

It's difficult enough for him to have Autism. He doesn't NEED anything else. SO now, the Principal has
decided that the Autism students can use the Nurse room toilet room. That way they will be alone and 
their aide will be outside the door. With the hall boys rooms the aide or teacher must wait in the hall.
So, they don't see or hear everything. OH, I just need to stay on my broom a little while longer until
it's all solved. THIS is just the beginning.

HOPE things are better in your world of  Autism.

Autism In New School

PRIVATE PROPERTY

copyright @ Autismforlife blogger. DO NOT COPY.

IT'S CALLED HONESTY! Thanks.

30 August 2013
So far today it's okay. Well, he does like eating lunch w/ all the other children in his class.
A first. His allergies are BETTER. He can actually sit in same room with others that
are eating things he's allergic to. He does like the hot lunches. What's NOT to like.
Pizza Wednesday. I haven't met a child that doesn't eat pizza. Today he wanted hot
lunch for the sweet potato fries. He loves sweet potatoes. Especially with cinnamon
butter.

He still wants his desk to not touch anything or anyone. AND don't even think of
touching him. Normally children may touch each other on the arm, or back but
NOT with this Child. His Autism keeps the normal stuff in check.

He's still reading. NOT as much now that school has started. He wants to get
home and do electronics. Well, since he's not doing it all day at school, I'm okay
with that. He is required to read one book per day~~~our family rules. If he
reads the book w/o being asked he gets a sticker. Amazing when the electronics
get grounded how many books he can read w/o being asked.  We have decided
that when anything electronic breaks, it's NOT getting replaced. I know, mean
parents huh!

HOPE your day has been a blessed one.

Our School Journal for Autistic Child First 3 Days

PHOTO COPYRIGHT @ autismforlife blogger.

do not copy my photo. 

25 Aug 2013 Sunday
Spiderman lunchbox packed for tomorrow. DARN I hope they let him stay even if I have to be w/ him. He is ready. Asked me yesterday to make him "kini bread" zucchini-banana bread. "AND drizzle lemon frosting on it Mommy". That means use real lemon juice and some County Time Lemonade and mix until running. He's not into sweets, just like the flavors. SO cute. THEN he said," and some applesauce-Lemon Muffins. And then some pasta". I spent much time baking and cooking and he was in heaven. He put kini bread in lunch w/ everything he likes. HAPPY time for us all. Blessings just keep arriving. I got books from library to keep me busy while he's @ school. HAPPY times, so far, so great!

ANSWERS I GOT ON MY FB PAGE:

A heart from Cindy.

GO BRAXTON! I'm so happy for you. Tell me how your first day was! from his Aunt Linda

Enjoy your 1st day of school my buddy!  from Pam.
***How did my buddy's 1st day go??? later from Pam.

How did it go this morning? R u going to post pics for a brief minute? Im excited to hear how it went, crossing fingers, saying a prayer o:) from cousin Sherilynn.

AND I ANSWERED:
Sorry Sherilynn & Aunt Linda... Didn't post photos. He had a really tough night. Tons of nightmares
from 7pm to morning. Mommy was on duty. Daddy duty is Friday & Saturday night.....cuz Daddy works
outside the home.

And her answer:  Hope it all goes well today. Keep us posted. Anxiety is never easy for anyone. Hang
in there it'll get easier + prayers+always  from cousin Sherilynn. 

26 August 2013 by my son age 9 yrs.

i like recess i played on climbing bars and laughed it is very loud in class i wear my ear boves i don't like that I get pushed i don't like it teacher said keep hands off and they don't i ate lunch with my class i never got to do it at other school i ate in my class with teacher i got tired school is all day daddy made me get out of bed i am tired they do not have ipad mine was at home my dog was at home i was at school i have to go back again i like to be at home my teacher was nice some of the kids are not i do not like kids i like big one the other lady is nice my mom said we are going back and that it will be nice i will call my sissy and tell this is from Braxton bye from Braxton i have spiderman backpack

MOMMY'S ANSWER:

 He's fine. Just grumpy and NOT wanting to go back. Braxton doesn't like kids of any age. Just adults. Teacher is from Colorado (happy dance here) and over 10 yrs experience. Aide has 5 yrs experience and neither of them yelled or degraded students today. HELLO that's a milestone for son to witness! HEY, he retyped what I wrote. AND that's okay. He doesn't like " or ' but note he MISSED one...ha ha. Love him. Seems I'm going to get told on. Autism DOES NOT LIE... he he Will post photos later. love to all, thx for the prayers.

From Cousin Sherilynn:

Thx for the update I feel like I'm part of the whole transition. Thank you.  I'm so proud of you, your a wonderful mother and a role model to all mothers of autistic children  and to quote Doc Holiday from the movie Tombstone "there is no normal life Wyatt. There's just life" I love you!! High five Braxton for me he did a SUPER GREAT JOB!!

From Pam:

Good!!!

From Ken (he also has a son  w/ Autism):

 Cool back pack(son's name was here)! Mine doesn't have anything on it. You don't get to have cool stuff when you are an adult. I hope the kids start treating you better. Just remember if it gets hard your mom loves you a lot, and it won't be long before you get to come home again!

From Kelly:

 That is great Mommy (my name was here). You are a super Mom! I can't believe that there could be moms that don't do everything they can for their children, but I know there is. God bless the children one and all! Good luck with everything! At least you know you can hold your head up high!

From Cousin Mary:

 For a little guy it's very well said. You're a good mommy!!

From DADDY:

He  reads @ above 10th grade and comprehension is same. Science--he's VERY advanced as well. ONLY two things he will do though.

From Terri:

Have a better day today (my son's name was here). 

27 August 2013

"What's on my mind? " SLEEP, that stuff I didn't get last night !!!!!!! My FB post this a.m.

 We left school @ 10am. The classroom is noisy. Well, if you put 12 children from first - third 

grade in one room it's gonna' happen. My son has ABOVE SUPERIOR HEARING. IF you 

watched the show M.A.S.H. think of Radar! He can hear anyone whispering from across the 

room. HE can hear us talking in whispers and he is downstairs and we are upstairs and NOT 

my vents. Even his headset doesn't block the loud noises in class. He got sick to his stomach 

and a headache. He's in the lazyboy laying down w/ PBS kids on so low I can't hear it....he 

hears every word. It's no ones fault, it's just his life. The District RN (doesn't have a child w/ 

Autism) thinks I need to get him into surgery. He won't get any surgery. He was born w/ heart 

problems. NOT going to take that risk. Every day I thank God he's my son. Every day I'm so 

happy WE CHOOSE him from NICU. YES, life would be easier if he wasn't Autistic.BUT NO 

one, save God himself knows what any child will be @ birth. I did make a rule today. NO ipad, 

DS or Wii if we stay home from school or come home from school. I don't want him to use this 

as an escape. Teacher said by end of week or next week class WILL be more calm or 

students will be put in time-out area (out of room). Looks to me like some of them can't calm 

down. Brax is medicated for his safety and others as well. NOT all parents agree but it's our 

choice and his medical TEAM agree. May the Lord bless each one of you. EVERY comment 

you make, Braxton reads. It just makes his heart soar that the "big uns" accept him, since 

children are mean and hateful to him---he has "frin" here.Ken, DON'T private post. WE have to 

stand up. WE have a different mission than other parents. Why God choose us, we won't know--

-until later. BUT he did choose us, stand proud my friend. My love to all.

MY ONLY ANSWER:

My son  has been in school since 2nd grade. His older brother has severe peanut allergies and had to be home schooled. My son can be very disruptive so we sent him to school. We faced some of the same issues with him. He couldn't take his toys and that took awhile to get past that. We let him play with Sonic until the bus came and took care of Sonic for him until he got home. It took a few weeks but he got past it. 
We had issues with the district. They have their own SE program, but even with his medications (childs name was here) was too much for them to handle. We picked him up every day for a month. The day we came to pick him up and two teachers were sitting on him in the gym that was it. He is now in a school that is set up for kids with behaviors. If your school isn't working out they have to provide an appropriate alternative. They will fight you every step of the way. Schools are faced with budget cuts and shortfalls and it costs more to send kids to an alternative school. But if they can't handle him, if he doesn't gain from the experience, ( and I know how hard it is to make any progress), push for another school. 
I didn't know this until we found a good advocate that had made major changes for Hawaii's schools and came here to help us, but any child can have an IEP, ( individual Education Plan), they just have to ask for one. If a family is going through a hardship and it effects a child's education his parents can request an IEP. 
I know you have that in place but you can call for a new one whenever you see a need. Call one and redefine (my  son's name was here) his  needs if you need to. Keep us posted. We'll keep praying for you!